"A Baby Changes Everything"

The title of the first sermon of Advent this year by the pastor of our church, Chuck Jacobs, was "A Baby Changes Everything". This sermon has set the wheels spinning and I now have the theme for this blog, I  hope my writing can makes some things come back alive, on this my 82nd birthday.

December 20, 1928; Seattle, Washington - Ballard Heights Hospital(I think) Five days before Christmas and another baby is added to the Bullard household with 3 other kids and Mom and Dad. Now there are 6 mouths to feed and things are still really tough. I know this because Uncle Steve and Aunt Zady told me the story of how word from Seattle came in May, asking them to come and rescue my family.

In June of 1929 Steve and Zady and family -Leroy and Wayne - set out in their new farm truck, with a tarp over the back, straw in the back end, camping equipment, firewood, and some sense of how to get from eastern Colorado to Seattle.

On the journey back to Wray, Colorado , so Aunt Zady told me a few years ago when I asked her why I was so deeply bonded to her, "that was the first time I visited Yellowstone National Park. She also said, "The worst part of the trip was finding milk for you." as the two families (10 people) camped there way back home. Apparently, the two families lived in the same house for the next year as my Dad found a way to survive, "back home".

Does a new baby make a difference, at Christmas time, in the midst of a depression? With six mouths to feed how much humility does it take to ask a brother to drive over 2400 miles - there were no super highways, just lots of gravel roads, ruts, mountain passes, and a new 28 ford farm truck - to rescue your family, and to go back home to face the other 5 brothers and 3 sisters?

I was the new mouth to feed, and Aunt Zady told me that her home was the place where both families learned how to survive and where I learned to walk, to talk and take my place in the whole scheme of things. According to the court records, in a little over 3 years my folks had divorced, and now there were 7 mouths to feed.

Bob went to live with our grandparents, Richard stayed with Dad. Virginia, Shirley, Lois, David and I went to Denver to live with our mother. Where did the 2 younger kids come from - according to the court records the divorce was granted in 1933, Lois and David came along after that date.

A baby changes everything - really changes everything! I grew up in Wray, Co. not in Seattle. Learned to love my Aunt Zady and Uncle Steve, (we named Stephen after him) and still to this day do not feel bonded to my parents.

Forgive me if this is too personal. I wonder, how Mary and Joseph must have felt to have "a mouth to feed" in their desperate situation? Herod wanted Jesus destroyed, a trip of some hundreds of miles - no super highways, just dirt roads, mountain passes, bandits, hunger, lots of walking, shelter is needed each night, diapers must be changed, milk must be found and there is no "home" to go back to!

Jesus is unaware of all these issues, he is just relaxed with his mother. Joseph, on the other hand, thinks of all these issues. He thinks that "home" will never be seen again, that Herod will find them and ultimately destroy Jesus - Kings have ways of getting their will done - but Joseph also knows that God sent an Angel, so he is on this journey even though there are no immediate answers.

I'm home now on my 82nd, comfortable in a warm house, with a sleeping wife, with plans for this evening to celebrate with Mark, Joanna and family. There does not seem to be journey of over 2400 miles - each way - through Yellowstone. There is no king with an edict to kill me, there is only that deep inner need to allow Jesus to reign internally ..... I hope that need never goes away!

Much love,
Bill

Hebrews 1:14

In the book of Hebrews the first chapter is a comparison of Jesus to angels.  In the 14th verse the question is asked, "What then are angels?" The answer was, " Are they not all ministering spirits, sent forth to minister (serve) for those who shall be heirs of salvation."

I am not smart enough not to believe nor not to ask for Jesus to send angels to serve.  This week I have received word from three very good friends which has prompted me to write this blog.  I want you to asked  Jesus to send angels to serve these 3 brothers.  I don't know how that service will be rendered, nor do I know the means that angels will use, all I know is that Jesus will send angels to "minister" to these men and their families.

Gene Herr - Newton,KS. Gene and I have walked together for uncounted years.  He and Mary were at one time the head of the Mennonite Youth work for the whole country.  Later they started a retreat center in Three Rivers, Mi, called Te Hermitage. For over 25 years Jesus has drawn hundred of people to "quiet their spirits and to listen to Him" as they walked through the woods or spent a day in silence.

Gene and Mary have now retired and are living close to family.  In a recent note Gene told of having gone through surgery for a "golf ball" size brain tumor followed chemo treatments " etc. As a teacher, listener and spiritual director Gene has walked with many people as they have found Jesus directing their lives..

An email, just this week, from the son of John Gilman told of John's surgery for a brain tumor.  John and I were at Willamette University together for a couple of years before he went into the Air Force.  John was later a TWA pilot/instructor until he retired to Kansas City where he and his wife Jeanna have served as lay ministers/teachers in several churches. John is also an excellent teacher and mentor...

A telephone call, last week, from Wes Trucker in Minnesota was to asked if we might get together for a long talk, face to face. ( My computer went blank at this point and we have been a week changing service.  We were told by "our man in India"  that the transmitter had died.  I think that it went to Aruba because of the bitter cold weather and I also think that Wilma and I should go and try to find that transmitter - should take about a month!)

Wes was in deep discouragementdue to declining health, a recent move from close friends etc. A week later he called to say that things have "turned around" and a date has been set for the second week in February.  I share this because Wes too needs prayer.  He is one of the best Bible teacher that I know.  He has served the Log Church in Crosslakes, Mn. and has developed Discipleship Ministers, Inc.  The influence of Wes is far ranging even as his mobility is deeply diminished.  Prayer for Wes as he lives out the rest of his ministry and life.

Since starting this blog we have moved closer to Christmas and even closer to my 82nd  birthday on the 20th..but not closer to the skills required by the digital world.  By the next blog we may have found out lost AOL transmitter!

Please keep Jesus as king of your inner and outer life...

Bill 

John 11:45 - 57

While Nancy Roesler and Wilma were out to an Advent dinner last evening Ken and I went to a small Chinese restaurant in Howell, Mi.after spending a couple of hours figuring out the computer world.  Ken is the expert in that world so I just kept saying yes!

After an excellent meal the check was delivered with 2 little fortune cookie.  I was still finishing my meal so Ken got first pick and I was left with the other cookie. Why share this anyway? We have all torn open a cookie package - some sayings are fun, others are stupid, the "lucky" numbers on the back of the slips of paper have never worked with the lottery etc. But, the message of my cookie has been the stimulus for this blog - remember yesterday was Thursday 12/2/10 and today is Friday, "On Friday your creative side will shine forth with exceptional ideas."  The "lucky" numbers on the back of the slip of paper are, 2 6 13 16 35 46 in case any of you want to try your "LUCK" !

Tony Campolo's famous talk "It Friday, but Sunday is Coming" has been swimming through my head since that fortune cookie:

Its Friday - Caiaphas, the high priest that year, and the Pharisees convened a council of the Sanhedrin....they gave orders that if anyone knew where Jesus was to report it, so that they might seize Jesus and kill him.

Its Friday - Jesus, a week before the Passover takes his disciples to Ephraim and there he stayed with them.
Why Ephraim?  In modern Israel this village is called Taiyibeh.  Ephraim was a city of refuge in the Old Testament. Ephraim as a village has a whole network of underground tunnels so that a person could escape into the wilderness should there ever be a threat on their life.  Jesus takes his disciples to Ephraim to protect them from the orders of the high priest.  Taiyibeh, according to Dr. Jim Martin with whom I have studied in Israel on a number of occasions, has been used until at least the 1500 to protect people from the invading armies. (When we encounter the name of a place in Israel we should ask ourselves, "What else happen in that same location or at least near that location? The writers of the Bible assumed that people had a background of knowledge about their history. Biblical history is not the forte for we who live in the 21st century.)  

Its Friday - the disciples decide to follow Peter back to Capernaum and the Sea of Galilee to start fishing again.

Its Friday - for so many of us in our times. It is so dark on Friday --- "a darkness fell over all the land" when Jesus was crucified.  A darkness can invade our lives when it is only Friday.  Friday seems to last forever in a failed marriage, in the lose of a job, in the "run away" of a child or the death of a child or other loved one.  Fridays are truly hard to take, darkness fills all the cracks in our lives, darkness lives in palaces, or dirt floored huts."BUT SUNDAY IS COMING" as Tony Campolo used to shout when he ended his speeches and then he would say, " AND DON'T YOU EVER FORGET IT!"

A fortune cookie, and a Thursday morning group of who men who were studying John's gospel about the raising of Lazarus from the dead, the death of Jesus and then Sunday is coming!  The resurrection changes everything - first inside of us and then sweeping into every facet of our lives!!!

Merry Christmas - truly, truly, truly.

Bill          

Thanksgiving 2010

How long ago was it that I left for the bright lights of the city (Hippos) just across the lake from home  (Capernaum)? I was a little headstrong when I asked for my inheritance.  I knew that in a cashless society that would mean having to sell some land - the south forty as we used  to call it back in Wray, Colorado - that is my father would give the land to me. I thought that someone would buy the land - fire sale prices would make that an easy sell - and I would be on my way to the longed dreamed about time of my life! A pocket full of money always makes a dream bigger and the anticipation much stronger.

A days journey around the top of the Sea of Galilee and I will be in heaven - maybe a two day journey but it will feel like freedom and who cares how long the journey will take?  I'm I'm away from home, away from big brother, away from responsibilities, away from that small town spirit - the big city!

Hippos - the city set on a hill.  I have heard the sounds as long as I can remember.  I have seen the fires at night time and have wondered what it must be like to dance around one of those fires, hearing the music, looking at the other young people and sensing  the fun they were having. Its only about 8 miles across the lake and sound travels really well when the winds are from the east. Hippos, I'm on my way and I have a pocket full of money - I hope you are ready!!!

Capernaum - you will be easily forgotten.  You are Jewish in every respect. The synagogue dominated our lives. Every day we were reminded that we were a special people set aside to worship and to claim our inheritance as God's people.. With a pocket full of cash who needs to be reminded of God anyway? Caperham the daily jobs needed to survive, your stay at home kind of people, your far from real life dusty streets, you will easily be forgotten - I've got a pocket full of cash!

How long does it take to go through a pocket full of cash - especially when new friends find out about the cash? It seems like only yesterday that I started on this trip.  Am I broke already? There must be some kind of job in Hippos that I can do. A country kid from Caperham should be able to compete with these cities guys.  Where to look to sustain the pleasures for the last few months? At last a job - if feeding pigs is a job, but I can survive in the big city with even a pig job.  But, the rent comes due, food is hard to come bye and pig smell is not too attractive and besides my people have never herded pigs so I'm an absolute novice!

Maybe I can go back home and asked if I could become hired hand on my fathers farm, of course my older brother is probably still at home - he hasn't seen a bright light in his whole life - but I can work around that. Its only a couple of days walk back home but I wonder if home is still there for me.  I really offended dad and the whole village when I sold my(?) part of the farm.  When the pockets are empty of cash, things really look different !!. 

Now, I sit at a banquet, the people of the whole village are licking their fingers from the fatted calf,  they are dancing, and I am here at the head of the table with my fathers robe over my shoulders, the family signet ring is on my finger, my sore feet are in my fathers sandals and I cannot even eat more than a small morsel of bread. My body is so wasted that I cannot even join in the feast! But, I am home. Home has never felt so good!  Even the man who bought my (?) part of the farm has greeted me, old friends whom I called stupid and lazy, even they have greeted and honored me - what a price my father has paid in letting me sit in his place at this banquet! But, I'm home - is there any place like home?  Any place whose "lights" are brighter, whose friendship embrace you - anyway?

Helmut Thielicke in his book THE WAITING FATHER wrote p.29 "Wherever forgiveness is proclaimed there is joy and festive garments.  We must read and hear this gospel story as it was rally meant to be: good news!"

Welcome home - and a truly happy thanksgiving banquet....

Bill

Train Trip

Last week was a renewed experience of slow down travel.  Inside of driving to Minnesota for an all day meeting a friend and I decided that an Amtrak trip would allow for relaxed conversation, long dialogues on long neglected subjects and needed direction.  Mostly all of that worked out - but - train travel is always subject to delays and this trip was not a disappointment in that matter! Arriving at 10:30 P.M. we were picked up by our hosts and driven 3 hour further north - is this the Artic Circle already? A short nights rest and then the all day meeting followed by a 3 hour trip back to the "cities", as St. Paul and Minneapolis are called.

After finding a Motel close to the train station - it i now 11:00 P.M. -  another short night - we made our way to the train station for a 7:30 A.M. departure - guess what - a 3 hour delay due to a frozen rail out in Montana someplace. The station master gave us directions to Bonnies Cafe - which proudly displayed the banner "Voted best by Twin Cities papers". How would a person find a small "hole in the wall" cafe except by a delayed train departure?

The trip back to Chicago gave plenty of time to get over the anger, frustration, missed connections, high prices in the dining and snack cars, and questions about why we did not fly -- but  it really was a good trip until we were stopped 10 miles out of Chicago to investigate whether a trespasser had been hit by the train. Finally we made it to Union station where Amtrak decided to put 5 of us, plus the driver into a small van for a 3 and a half hour trip to Jackson, MI. close to home, another short night with hopes of recovery the next day! I've almost forgotten the reason for the whole trip, but as good friend Bruce would say, "Its a great, restful, way to travel"!

We are home for Thanksgiving and through the rest of the year - maybe.
 Bill




   

The Lord's Prayer

11/10/10

This past week Wilma and I were in the Washington D.C. area.  I had a board meeting and we saw a number of our friends ( all over the geographical map - so lots of driving ).

Last Sunday we attended the church we attended over 50 years ago, with good friends.  This morning I woke with my mind racing.  This blog will be an attempt to capture the feelings that I am still processing.

This great church, still with a beautifully robed choir, great singing, a gifted preacher, at least 3 morning services, an expanded building, (neighborhood parking plus bus service from a local mall)  i.e. lots of people, and yet ---I came away with the feeling that I had sat through a service of 50 or more years ago. Every part of the service was the same with a different preacher, different people in the choir, different choir director, different support young pastor, different men taking up the collection etc. etc.

At then end of the preaching we were led to the communion portion of the service - only this time the elements were broken wafers and grape juice in plastic rather than glass cups. Everything was the same, I guess most of that must be good, but in the end the pastor led the congregation to say  the Lord's Prayer. What struck me, was that I, and those around me, seemed to "mumbled" the prayer! At least is what it feels like right now. Why didn't someone stand up and yell out don't mumble this prayer.  Why don't we yell out to Jesus that we want his name to be honor in our lives?  Why don't we yell out to Jesus that we want what he is thinking and dreaming about to happen here on earth as it is in heaven?  What he is thinking about to truly happen in DC or Ann Arbor or anywhere else in the world.?

Fifty years ago at that great old church the people mumbled their way  through the same prayer. ; And, now fifty years later I mumbled my way through the prayer again because I didn't have the guts to stand up and really lay  my heart before Jesus - and apparently neither did anyone else in the congregation. My trip to Ethiopia has apparently changed something inside of me.  When the kids at the school "mumbled" the same prayer and I was able to think with them about the prayer, to think with them about what it really means to pray, "thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven" and they began to tap their chests in a gesture of "speaking to their hearts" I too changed
; I can't "mumble" the Lord's Prayer any longer.  Jesus do I really want what you are thinking about to become reality here on earth? Jesus do I really want your name to honored here on earth as it is honored in heaven? Jesus may your will, your thinking, your dreaming, really be done in my home, my country, in other countries, etc.

Today, I'm back in the days of the old church in DC hearing the people "mumble" their way through the prayer and I wonder what it takes to gets people to ask, "Jesus, will you teach us how to pray?" Are people all over the world "mumbling" their way through the prayer as we seem to be doing and as the kids in Ethiopia seemed to be doing also. Did the disciples of Jesus quickly begin to mumble the prayer? Jesus, please teach us to pray!  

New book

Last week Ken and I went to Ft. Wayne, IN.  to the headquarters of Project Mercy ( both of us are on the board of PM ) while there we were introduced to a new book TESTIMONY - The Terrible Beauty Of Aids, Genocide, and Hunger in Sub-Saharan Africa by Sean Sheridan of Colorado Springs, CO.  Published in 2010.
This book was 5 years in the making and is the work of a photographer and his team.

In the introduction Sean wrote, " For me caring about Africa and those caught up in extreme poverty is as simple as knowing that the children and families who suffer in these places could have just as easily been mine. Knowing this, I feel compelled and responsible to treat them as I would want to be treated if it were me, or my family, standing in their shoes. So, I'm working toward that.  If you're in the same boat, then you're holding the right book.

"Here are two things you might consider  First, you can safely believe that statistics about Africa.  It is and emergency.  It is as bad as 'they.' say it is and is likely to get worse in some ways before it gets better in most ways. But to complicate matters, many efforts in Africa are, for a variety of reasons, perpetuating a need for crises-driven aid and development that can create and unhealthy dependence in Africans and caregivers. Politics and power plays --- these are the development world's downside, and they are not easily undone.

"Second, don't let seemingly insurmountable problems prevent you from getting involved --- just be smart about how you do it.  Despite the fact that some people and organizations are still stumbling along Africa's rocky road of development, others are already doing many things right and are learning all the time.  That's something worth joining, however flawed it may be.

"This is the fabric that weaves itself through the stories of Roda, Bekele and Rabirye...what we discovered, on the backstroke, was not so much an important development lesson, but how, when properly encouraged and equipped, the human spirit can rise up to create something remarkable: grace in the midst of turmoil, hope in the middle of pain, and the roots of transformation growing deep into the rich soil, fabric, and lives of Africa.

"That is the terrible beauty of Africa.  This is their testimony."

Belele is a young boy who was carried, for weeks, by his sister to Project Mercy in Yetebon because it was at the school that he would get food and help. On our trip to Ethiopia we had the privilege to meet his sister, and I did not even know who she was, in order to thank her. Bekele's story is the middle part of the book TESTIMONY.

As I look back on being no the Board of PM for 25 years, I am amazed that Jesus let me be involved in the Yetebon project.  We, the Board, said yes to a request by the people of Yetebon, even though we had never done a "development project"! That yes 20 years ago has, through much effort on the part of Deme and Marta and others produced something worth replicating. But, at what price for the future generation of Ethiopians? The Bright Futures Union, started by the young people who have been educated in our school, will need a clear vision and heart to carry out a vision for their country.  This too is part of the "development project" in Yetebon.

Bill 

61 year ago

10/30/10

Just this last month I have had the opportunity to listen to a 2009 DVD which featured Paul Young the author of the book THE SHACK. The DVD had been loaned to us about a year ago asking us to listen to it and then send it on to other friends. Yesterday I received permission to start the DVD on its long delayed journey back home. I need to pass the DVD to others and to extract vital quotations for my own life.

Wilma and I had read the book at least a year ago and essentially set it aside.  Lots of questions about the book at first, all the different images etc. and then we forgot about the book and hurried along into our routines.  Our fiends came into town a month ago and while having dinner asked if we could return the DVD. First, I had to find it! 

The ironic part of all of this is that October 2009 it is exactly 60 years since I began my "journey" with Jesus Christ. Now, 61 years later I hear the story of why THE SHACK was written.  One of Paul Young's comments was, " the shack is a metaphor for the heart....".                                  

This morning as I was pondering some Paul's comments it occurred to me that I too have my "shack" - different than Paul's shack, for sure, but it is still a shack, my shack! What saved my life was an obscure verse that I had not even memorized -- "even though our hearts condemn us, Jesus is greater than our hearts."  That morning, many many years ago now, I was able to step back from my "cliff", a hole in the ice of a very deep lake. On the drive home from that retreat, broken and all alone, Jesus spoke to my heart and told me that I had needed to see my "shack" but that he still had a ministry for me.

Sixty one years later, I understand now, even more, how deeply Jesus loves me, how much comfort there is in that love, and how much freedom comes from opening the door to the shacks that we create.

When I get the DVD back I'll try to filter out some of the quotations that were used to give me a glimpse of this wonderful journey in Jesus Christ, including the many bumps in the road!


Bill
  .

continuation of previous blog

10/27/10
While driving home from the group this morning I placed a call to the person who invited Tom to call me, "Pete"  will be his name.

We had a short conversation about Tom and his response to our hour long telephone talk last week --- apparently really good -- I then asked Pete how things were going with him, with his job, with his marriage etc. There was a little discussion of his personal  issues, then I asked if he is still praying "Jesus what you are dreaming about for my marriage would you make that become my reality?" His response was, "I'm trying to!" 

In Jeremiah 29:11.12 the Bible states, "I know the thoughts I think towards you says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.Then you will come to Me and I will listen to you....."  Pete, Jesus is thinking about you and dreaming about you and your marriage and your life  ----- ask Jesus to make his thoughts and dreams to become your reality - "on earth even as it is in heaven."  I this not what is meant when we say in the Lord's prayer - thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven?  How often have we said that prayer and never really asked that Jesus make his thinking and dreaming to become our reality - even now?

Pete and I will get back together next week, via telephone --- I really look forward to the next conversation.
Bill

latest telephone calls

In the past two weeks I've received telephone calls that have required an explanation of the "released friend" concept.  I think a short review of the call will be helpful..

The first call was to introduce the person who would make the second call.  Both calls were from young men who have small families, attend the same church and have a budding relationship in a small group and live in a university community - not in Michigan. I'll give the name Tom to the second caller.

Tom has recently moved to that university to serve in a ministry to a segment of the student population. He has moved with his wife and 3 small boys from a major city.  One requirement for the move was that he would have to raise his own support. With a little more that 60% of the financial needs for the ministry and the family Tom was seeking some advice.

In the hour long conversation I shared how the "released friend" concept came to me.  Tom's response was "How can I become a released friend?"  We then did a quick study of Paul and Barnabas out of Acts where the church in Antioch sent them on their first missionary journey.  I asked Tom, "Who beside you and your wife wants you to be in ministry?" His response was so typical, "I don't know!" When Wilma and I left Washington D.C. to move to the Midwest we were given our monthly salary for 6 months with a stipulation that that amount would be reduced on a monthly basis so that we would be on our own after 11 months. If our efforts in ministry did not provide for us then I was committed to get a job and serve in the mission on a volunteer bases.  Wilma and I have now served over 40 years on that commitment.  We have been "released friends" because the people have wanted us to be free to "serve God and people". Maybe this year I will have to get a job!
To be continued!
Bill

This is new for me

This blog is a new attempt to communicate - at least for me!  In the days ahead I hope to share some thoughts that will be worth reading and will become a trigger for response.  The "released friend" concept was given to me several years ago when a man wanted to find out what I do.  After sharing how I have worked with men in small groups, he said, "I know exactly what you do. What church do you l think I belong to?" His church is the Quaker Church i.e. The Society of Friends.  In their fellowship they have the concept of releasing a person to "Serve God and man". Those people are then given the title of "Released Friend".He then told me, "That is what you are!" Though I am not a part of the Quaker Church, this concept is one of the best ways to describe what I actually do.

Since that conversation I have tried to live out that concept in every part of me life.  For over 40 years now I have been "released" to serve people in the name of and through Jesus the Messiah.  This blog will become, I hope, a part of serving people.  Please join me in this journey!
Bill